Most attackers lack training as fighters. They use surprise, physical size and the belief that their prey will be paralyzed or submit.
Good self-defense training is the one thing that kills the assumption that is at the core of good self-defense.
It’s important to be familiar with what the most frequent attacks on women are so you don’t become a statistic. Knowing what’s being thrown, positioning of the attacker, the purpose of the throw, etc., means you’re no longer a passive target, you have options. Fit, comfortable real options for all sizes, strengths and fitness levels.
The Empower Her women’s self-defense program at Instinct Defense Academy in Portland is all about reality-based training, not sport-based training, and it’s about the skills that activate in your body when it needs them most, not when you are in the gym.
Here are 10 of the most common attacks against women, and what to do when they occur.
1. Wrist Grab
Why it happens: A wrist grab is a rapid control technique that is employed to drag, redirect, or to try to prevent an escape. One of the most common initial assaults on women.
How to escape: The weakest of any grip is the thumb. Turn your wrist sharply toward the attacker’s thumb and pull explosively in that direction. Never pull directly backwards, that’s their strong suit. One continuous movement of rotation + pull to create distance. This is not due to the force but because of the joint anatomy – it’s just that a smaller person can break a larger grip every time if the rotation is correct.
2. Hair Pull
Why it happens: Pulling of hair is a way of asserting control and redirecting. It produces instant pain and evokes a “freeze” reaction. That is a point of attack from which attackers hope to profit.
How to escape: Don’t be tempted to pull away. Cover the attacker’s hand on your hair with two hands, pushing it into your own head, which neutralizes the pain and allows you to exert control over the attacker’s hand. There, punch a knee into the groin, stomp their instep or elbow them. When they burst out of their shells, they move.
3. Front Choke – Two Hands on Throat
Why it happens: A front choke is used to quickly disable and to let the handler know he has complete control. Most women instinctively grab at the attacker’s wrists and pull outwards, but this is the wrong thing to do.
How to escape: Tilt the chin to the ground, bend the knees and both arms down strike upwards like a swimmer diving (between the arms of the attacker) This is a way to break the grip without exerting strength, at the thumb gap. Immediately follow with a palm strike to the nose/knee to the groin. Make a 1-second gap and Sprint Run.
4. Choke from Behind
Why it happens: If someone comes up to them from behind, they have no chance to see the attack and the airway is closed as soon as the attack occurs. There is virtually no reaction time.
How to escape: As soon as the arm is around your throat, press your chin in to one side with a lot of force, making a very small air pocket. Lower body by squatting at the knees. Punch the opponent’s ribs with the inside of your elbow and push the opponent’s instep with your heel while driving your elbow into the opponent’s ribs as far as it can go. These two strikes become easier to hold. When there is space, turn, turn to the opponent and run.
5. Bear Hug – Arms Pinned
Why it happens: It occurs when a woman is tricked or coerced from a safe place into a vehicle, alley or isolated area. It is a tactic that is related to kidnapping. After reaching a secondary area, chances of escaping rapidly decrease. The main objective is to prevent the drag.
How to escape: Lower body to the floor, but not touching. This requires the attacker to support your entire weight and makes it impossible for him to move around. Slap the instep of their foot with your heel, push your head backwards into their face and press your elbows into your ribs. If you lose traction, then you have time to turn to face the person and run loudly.
6. Bear Hug – Arms Free
Why it happens: It’s the same idea as the above, but not quite so constricting as that and your arms remain free. This is commonly used as a pull, but before going to a pinned hold.
How to escape: Elbow in ribs on attacker, drive elbows back to ribs several times. Raise your head up towards their face. Wrap around two of their fingers and vigorously bend them backwards. The reasons to break the hold are any of these disturbances. When you see space open, drop, spin and run.
7. Side Headlock
Why it happens: A side headlock restricts the head and neck, forces compliance, and stops the target from turning towards the attacker. When an attacker has already come into contact with the victim and wishes to increase the intensity of the contact.
How to escape: Avoid pulling your head out, this provides the attacker with a good point of leverage. Lower down, feel your knees bend and embrace your arms around your waist. Push weight into their hip and sweep/trip the closest leg. Or press the thumb in the direction of their eye or hit them with two fingers in their throat. These are targets of soft tissue that require little force to break, and are excellent for breaking a headlock.
8. Grab from Behind — Shoulders or Arms
Why it happens: This control grab is executed to twist the target, push them down or to arrange for a more serious attack. This is often the initial step in escalation.
How to escape: When you sense the grab then do not pull forward, drop your weight and turn in towards the attacker’s body. Their strength is when they are spinning away. When spinning in, it is sudden and you’ll find yourself in close proximity to the other person, with knees, elbows and palm strikes on hand. Both a knee to the groin and a palm strike to the nose are effective means of causing disruption in order to break free.
9. Push or Takedown Attempt
Why it happens: Once someone is down on the ground, things change. Reality on the ground is completely different; size and weight have far greater significance and escape is much more difficult. Push and takedowns are the tools for the attackers to move from the standing confrontation to the ground.
How to escape: Open up the stance right away, thus reducing the center of gravity, which makes you much harder to tip. Keep your lead leg flexed and push forward with your weight, don’t take the force. If you do fall, roll to your side and kick your knees, groin or shins repeatedly with your feet. When the attacker backs up or hesitates, roll, get up and run.
10. The Lure – Social Engineering Attack
Why it happens: Many severe attacks start before anybody comes into contact with them. When an intruder moves closer by using a pretext such as asking for directions, offering to help, posing as an emergency, etc. a lure has been used. It is perhaps the most widely adopted mechanism leading to violence against women – the use of social tact.
How to escape: You get out of it without it overtaking you physically. Always trust your instincts, if it doesn’t feel right, it’s not right, it is a survival message. You never have to stop, engage or be polite to an uncomfortable stranger. Move to a new position, turn around or enter a populated area. If they continue, speak up loudly: I don’t know you, I don’t like you, back away. Non-compliant targets are signaled by noise and assertiveness. The vast majority of attacks right away give up the idea.
What All 10 Attacks Have in Common
All of these attacks require you to not know what to do in the first two seconds.
Outcomes are determined during that window, the first window of shock. Attackers know this. The entire theme of a strength-based attack is to outpace your brain.
Training isn’t just about learning technique. Remodels your knee-jerk reaction so you can control the first two seconds rather than them. This is what Bujinkan Budo Taijutsu is designed to accomplish: Empower Her. A system that has been honed over centuries to protect the smaller defender against the larger more powerful one. No experience required. No athletic prerequisite. No minimum age.
We are located in Bethany, Portland, teaching women’s self-defense since 1991. Led by 15th Dan Shihan Master Peter Kramer, Empower Her will cover all 10 of the above attack scenarios as well as situational awareness, verbal boundary setting and threat recognition. Also available as an online self-defense course.
Final Word
Education on these attacks is a first step. Step two is to develop the reflex to react – there’s real safety in that.
The Empower Her program from Instinct Defense Academy does both in Portland with 35 years of focused women’s self-defense instruction.
Your safety is not something to outsource. It is something to own.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: What are the most common attacks on women in real life?
The most common physical attacks reported are wrist grabs, hair pulling, front choke, rear choke, pinned bear hug, free bear hug, side headlock, shoulder grab and ground takedowns. The most common precursor to serious violence is social engineering lures (when the attacker approaches someone through a pretext). These are only a few of the scenarios that should be covered in a complete women’s self defense program.
Q: Can women's self-defense techniques actually work against a bigger, stronger attacker?
Yes. The best self defense techniques for women are those that target the most vulnerable areas of the body – the eyes, throat, groin, knees and finger joints – that are common to all bodies, no matter their size. You’re not using muscle, you’re using biology when you hit that lady in the groin with a knee or hit her in the eye with a thumb. But the Budo Taijutsu taught at Instinct Defense Academy in Portland, Oregon has been designed for this type of asymmetric combat.
Q: What should I do first when someone grabs me?
Do not freeze. The attack is lost from the attackers’ hands when any voluntary movement is made. Second, you have to guard the most important thing in those seconds: your airway when choking, your balance when pushed, your mobility when grabbed. Women self-defense training will condition these maneuvers into muscle memory, so they are performed in adrenaline without the need to think about them.
Q: How long does it take to learn useful self-defense?
You can learn self-defence to defend yourself within weeks and not years. This isn’t about being a master of martial arts, it’s about programming a high percentage of responses for possible attack situations. You’re more capable in real life after a few months of quality women self defense classes in Portland than most are in their entire lifetime.
Q: What makes Empower Her different from a one-day self-defense workshop?
Concepts are introduced at One-day Workshops. Empower Her at Instinct Defense Academy is a consistent and progressive training program in a dedicated women’s environment, which is the difference between reading about swimming and swimming. Empower Her can be attended in-person in Bethany, Portland or as an online women’s self-defense course.
Q: Should I carry pepper spray instead of learning self-defense?
Pepper Spray and alarms are great tools to include in a safety plan, but not alternatives to trained responses. Tools are capable of being dropped, lost or removed. Skills cannot. The best personal safety strategies for women are situational awareness, physical escape and tools. Instinct Defense Academy’s Empower Her program covers everything so that you never have to rely on having the right thing at the right time.